How to write meaningful paid song reviews on slicethepie.com.

For anyone who doesn't know, Slicethepie.com is a music review site where ordinary members of the public can join up free, listen to new songs (or at least the first 90 seconds of them) and write a review consisting of a few sentences or more. The review is just the members opinion of the song and/ or the artist - there's no special musical skill or knowledge required. They want the opinion of the wide general public.

Slicethepie rewards each review with a payment of a few cents (more or less depending on several factors, such as quality, length, your member rank, etc) -. It's not a fortune, but it mounts up nicely in the background, and you can easily earn a few dollars reward from a single 'scouting' session.

As an experienced reviewer on slicethepie and also an experienced musician, I've written this article to advise new scouts (or fellow hubbers interested in getting involved) on how to write meaningful reviews that can be more helpful to the artist, even if they (the reviewers, not the artists) don't have any background in music other than as a listener.

The money is a nice bonus, but, for myself and many others, it's not the main attraction. The main attraction is the feeling of being involved in giving valuable feedback to up-and-coming musicians who put their songs out to see what kind of reception the song can expect from the general public - us!. Artists who get the highest ratings from the reviewers can become eligible for financing to set them on the road to commercial success.

You can type your review straight into the review text box while listening to the song, (although, you have listen to at least 90 seconds before you can submit the review). Reviewing the song while you listen means you can comment on various features as they come up. Here are some typical musical features that come up in a typical song. You can comment on any features of the song you feel are worth commenting on, but you should at least fill the text box.

Imagine a song that you know well, and focus on the following features as it plays out in your mind.

Intro - If the song has an intro, what do you think of it? Some intros are atmospheric and capture your imagination from the start - or they establish a good beat that sets up the song. They do what an intro is supposed to do - lead into the song naturally. Some intros you hear don't do that, but lead awkwardly in to the main part of the song. If there's nothing special about the intro, then there's no need to comment on it.

Vocal melody. What do you think of it? Is it tuneful? interesting? Is it the kind of tune (melody) that would be easy to remember? Commercially, that's a positive quality, even if it's one of those awful songs that you can't get out of your head for a couple of days.
How about the singer? Listen to his or her vocal quality. Is it a rich tone? Or is it thin? How expressively do they sing the lyrics? How consistent is their vocal quality? They may sound great until they try to get the high notes and go all screechy.

Lyrics - Can you make them out? Some lyrics aren't in English, so you obviously can't comment on the lyrical content, if you don't understand the language. But you can still hear the flow of words. All good songwriters choose words and phrases, not just for their meaning, but also for their sound and natural rhythmic quality.

How are the lyrics in the song you've got in mind? Are they deep and meaningful, or shallow and childish? Pretentious? predictable? amusing? cringeworthy, cheesy? original? imaginitive? interesting? offensive? - Lots to choose from there.

The instrumental arrangement The qualities to listen out for here are:

• Rhythm
  Is it a solid beat and strong engaging rhythm that grabs you and carries you along?. If so, that's a good quality. If not, it doesn't make it a bad quality. Not all great songs are catchy. Rhythmic effects can be flowing, subtle, pronounced, complex, etc., but there should be some consistency and conviction, whatever the rhythmic style used.
• Instrumental variety and balance
  If a song has a rich variety of interesting instruments, it can make it more distinctive and memorable. The arrangement also has to be tasteful though, and suit the mood of the song. For example, a saxophone is a very expressive instrument, but would be out of place in many styles of music.
  If a song has an accompaniment of just a single strummed guitar, for example, listen to how effectively (or not) the artist makes it interesting by varying the rhythm or dynamics and avoids a boring mechanical strum throughout.
• Digital effects
  Although effects can be striking and really enhance a song, there's a noticeable tendency among less experienced musicians to overuse them. Rather than enhance the song, overuse makes it sound cheap and amateurish. Among less talented musicians, they're often used in a vain attempt to compensate for a lack of musical quality. That never works. There's no substitute for musical quality.

You can make your review more interesting and meaningful by using a wide variety of well chosen words and phrases. Don't keep using the word 'good' all the time, and definitely stay away from the "Awesome dude!" or "You guys suck" style of review, if you want it to be taken seriously. Use words that are more descriptive and specific.

Honest reviews are expected, of course, but there's no harm in being diplomatic too. The reason that your opinion is valuable is because, unlike the artists themselves (and their friends and families), you can be completely objective. The artists can be too closely involved with the music to hear faults and weaknesses. They need an objective and unbiased opinion - and any advice, if you have some.

Here's a tiny selection of terms that may be relevant to the musical qualities you want to describe.

For melodies
Positive - tuneful, interesting, shapely (or well-shaped), strong, melodious, memorable, original,
Negative - plain, shapeless, tuneless, boring. too simple, overly complex, unoriginal

For vocals
Positive: - distinctive, rich, warm, expressive, feeling, strong, attractive, appealing, confident, conviction, heartfelt, clear, stylish, impressive, pitch range, dynamic, edgy, raw, powerful
Negative: - thin, weak, inconsistent, out of tune, pitch problems, expressionless, bland, self conscious

For lyrics
Positive - original, amusing, thought-provoking, inspiring, heart-warming, punchy, meaningful, clever, deep,
Negative - plain, uninspiring, weak, pretentious, cheesy, corny, cringeworthy, obscure, confusing, predictable, repetitive, offensive.

For instrumental accompaniments
Positive: balanced, varied, full, rich, rhythmic, engaging, compelling, competent, smooth, accomplished, imaginative, creative, solid, original, exciting, powerful, driving, atmospheric, ethereal,
Negative: Weak, plain, safe, uninspired, lacking conviction, poor balance, untogether, over-sentimental, unvaried, lacking contrast. strident, harsh

Structure

If the song has a familiar arrangement of sections, e.g., verses, choruses, instrumental sections, then it makes it easy for the average listener to feel at home with it, which, in turn, make it more commercially attractive. This applies to most styles of music. They don't all have verses and choruses, of course, but they all have contrasting sections.

Commercial potential
You should always keep commercial potential in mind. Even if you don't like the song, try to imagine how the song's target audience would receive it. Some songs are excellent, but in a style that isn't in great demand commercially. They can still find niche outlets and have limited success. For example, you might hear an old 50s or early 60s rock and roll style song. It could be a superb example of that style played to perfection, but it's not a style that's attractive to mainstream commercial investors, who worry they wouldn't get enough of a return on their investment. The main commercial quality of songs like that is nostalgia, and nostalgia is a niche market.

Performance quality
Even without any musical knowledge on your part, and even if the singing and playing are technically competent, you can get a feel for things like how much the artist or artists enjoy and believe in what they're doing. Even if not technically brilliant, a vibrant performance, full of confidence, conviction, style and flair, is obviously going to be far more attractive commercially than a lacklustre performance by artists who sound like they'd rather be someplace else

Another quality you'll come across is over expressiveness. The artist wants to make an impression emotionally, but overdoes it and it comes across sounding insincere, put on, melodramatic and pretentious - that's a worst case scenario, but it's not that uncommon.

Production and recording quality
Don't be too hard on poor production and recording quality. The artist may have very limited means, and it's the best possible sound they can get from very basic recording and mixing equipment.

On the other hand, sloppy recording deserves to be criticised. (unintended distortion, bumping into the mic, or even coughing into it.) Even with the most basic of equipment, a professional approach to the recording is more impressive than a 'couldn't care less' attitude in a recording studio.

As you can't pick and choose the styles and genres that you can review, you may have to review songs in a style that you're not familiar with. It's not a problem. You can still review the song by commenting on qualities that are common to most styles of music, such as, balance, tastefulness, originality, style, variety, impact, emotion, and last but not least, commercial potential.

You're free to let the artist know that you don't like that style or genre, but it would be unfair to rate an individual song low on those grounds. Don't let your personal taste cloud your judgement of what could become a major hit.

Here are some sample reviews to give an idea of the types of reviews that artists find useful, even if you're telling them something they don't want to hear. Compose your own reviews in your own style of course, but aim to make them relevant, descriptive and informative.

Slicethepie also have quality controls in place that automatically reject reviews that are offensive, too short, lacking in musical terms, or too similar to your previous reviews (hence the need to have a wide vocabulary of descriptive terms). On the other hand, they pay a higher bonus for reviews that meet and surpass their quality standards.

Example 1 - A glowing review - 9/10

This is a great song and performance. The melody is strong and tuneful. The singer has an attractive vocal tone, and puts real feeling into the lyrics. The lyrics are interesting and meaningful with some punchy phrases. Instrumentally, the song has a rich, full accompaniment that complements the vocal track perfectly. Great guitar solo too, although I think a grittier tone would suit the dark mood of the song better.
The performance quality is high throughout, both vocally and instrumentally. Overall, the song is distinctive and original, and I think it has strong commercial potential.

Example 2 - A good song badly arranged - 6/10

I think this song has some good musical qualities but needs a better musical arrangement. The singer has a distinctive and attractive vocal tone, but is often drowned out by the powerful instrumental accompaniment. The synth tones are far too harsh and strident. The singer should be allowed to dominate the song without having to compete with the accompaniment. The lyrics seem quite interesting, but can't always be heard clearly because of the poor vocal-instrumental balance. It's quite a tuneful song, though, and could be easily improved with a more tasteful instrumental arrangement.

Example 3 - A negative review.- 3/10

This song has some problems. The intro is too long, and doesn't really develop or build up enough to justify such a long intro. The singer has some pitch accuracy issues (that's a diplomatic way of saying "out of tune"). The melody is weak, and the lyrics are quite plain and repetitive. The instrumental arrangement is reasonably good in terms of balance, and it provides a solid enough accompaniment, but it needs to be a bit more varied and interesting, and definitely more expressive for greater impact. Overall, I think the song doesn't have enough quality in its present state.

I hope you find the reviewing advice in this article helpful, and will be encouraged to submit meaningful reviews that the artists will appreciate and benefit from. If not already a reviewer, why not give it a try, it can be quite addictive - and it pays. And, no, they don't have any referral scheme (I wish they had).

Also. Be patient as there's still a few glitches on the site since their recent major upgrade.

Update Feb 07 2012. Well, well - Slicethepie have now introduced a referral scheme that pays you a referral bonus equivalent to 10% of the referred friend's earnings. All the more reason to join, if not already a member.
If you found the article above useful, feel free to join under me via the link below.

Here's the link: slicethepie.com paid song reviews
Happy scouting!